Yer Enemies List

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Yer Chicken. Nothing to worry about here, except they get underfoot at the worst
possible moments. In the Rides version I like to hack em to bits with the cycle, and it's downright
funny when you let em have it with the alien arm gun. (But a total waste of ammo)

Yer Cow. No trouble ever came of these gentle creatures, but if yer real good with
yer spacebar, tipping em over is a real hoot.

Yer Pig. Now don't be shootin yer friendly pigs. They can be real useful as
a means to climb onto areas you can't quite jump to.

Yer skeeter. Now these alien swamp skeeters got thayselves one heck of a nasty bite.
Practice yer marksmanship taking em out with yer pistol. In the Rides Agin version take em out with
yer sickle.

Yer Skinny Old Coot. These guys are more of a problem than a threat. Don't waste
yer big guns on them. Take em out with yer handgun, or in Rides let em have it with yer sickle. It's
funnyier n' hell when ya lop their heads off. In the Rides Again version ya can run em down with
yer chopper or yer airboat.

Billy Ray, yer basic good ol boy gone bad. Then aliens dun cloned ol Billy-Ray a
bunch, but it stretched his less-than-abundant intelligence a might too far. Now these can be trouble,
but if ya stay on yer toes they won't be too much of a problem. Take em out with yer shotgun. Now if
ya comes across one what ain't payin too much attention, sneak up on em and whack em good upside
the head with yer crowbar. it's dang funny, but quick like grab yer shotgun and let em have it or yer
in fer trouble. From a distance it ain't too hard to take em out with yer pistol.

Sheriff Lester T Hobbs. Now this old boy ain't no-one to be foolin around with.
He might be dumber n' a pork sausage, but he's damn deadly. Take him out quick as you can.

Yer dawg. Now this here's not yer cute lil Petey from the Little Rascals kinda pit
bull dawg, it's one nasty bad-ass cur gone rabid. Never show any fear, and fer gosh sakes never
turn yer back on it or ever even think of running away. Crouch down and let it get close, then back
up a step or two and let em have it with both barrels from yer shotgun.

Yer alien saucers. Them alien clones have become a terror to behold when
they're in these damn flyin saucers. Stay clear of em and take em out quick as you can. Their
weapons are lethal as all git-out

Yer Turd Minion. Now these little boogers really drive me nuts. They're slippery little shit monkeys, and can be darn hard to hit no matter what yer shootin at em with. If yer on dry land, toss a stick of dynomite in the water near em. In Rides Again, run em over with yer airboat.

Assface. What can I say, I love this guy. He is Assface, he is lord of this
place. Now his claws are talons of death that will slice you faster than a salad shooter, he spits corn
at you and throws poopoo at you too, but he's made of turds and has a brain of the same stuff. Keep
some distance and have yerself a good laugh at the poor fool, and take him out at yer leisure. Just
stay clear of those talons.

Yer Alien Vixen. This is one dangerous she-male. Kinda like Hillary Clinton on bad acid
with machine gun turrets in her dat-gum bra. The Queen Vixen is even more trouble. Take these
creatures as serious as a heart attack. Their karate kicks are fatal, and their personalities ain't
much better. Take em out with yer hunting rifle, once ya start shooting at em DO NOT LET UP,
even fer a second or yer toast. Once ya start shooting at em, keep walking straight at em shooting
till yer sure they is deader than Jimmy Hoffa.

Yer alien hulk. These bad boys ain't nothing to fool around with. They're
deadlier than eboli, but lucky enough they is dumber n' a turnip. Once you take em out be sure to
blow em up or they'll come right back to life. Once ya kills one, grab his arm gun. It's a formidable
weapon.

RIDES AGAIN SPESHUL BAD GUYS

Yer Jackalopes. Now the real texas jackalopes are bad enough, but
these alien cloned ones are nothin but a menace to polite society. Now don't be wastin yer big guns
on em, let em have it with yer sickle or yer pistol. One pistol shot and they'll run back from ya,
and ya just let em have it agin till they is done fer. They splatter real good when ya run em over
with yer Harley.

Daisy May, yer cheerleader. Now this may appear to be one cute little honey bunny
what with her cute lil high-school prom queen cheerleader outfit, but don't be fooled. She's
deadlier than a texas rettle snake. Her high kicks can bust yer guts and she's the world master at
snappin her bra-straps at ya. That gal is positively lethal.

Biker Frank Doyle. Now this here's one can of trouble if there ever was one. He's
packin twin sawed off shotguns and is not exactly the model of stability. I'd like to ass that this
character and his dialog was based on Dennis Hopper's Frank Booth character from the David Lynch
movie "Blue Velvet". If you haven't seen it head to yer local video store and rent it. It'll give you an
insite into the guys who made this game that should keep you awake fer a few nights. ROFL
* Speshul note, if this guy kills you, leave the screen alone fer a moment. he does something downright
disgusting before the screen action ends.

Now when he's on his hawg, ol Frank Booth is more trouble than a
self-rightious bible thumpin temperance league matron. Keep as far away as you can and use any means
available to take him out.

The same applies to this even more dangerous combo, Frank on his
chopper accompanied by his cheer-babe, Daisy. Watch yer backside.

Yer "Mama" Jackalope. Now this here is
one of the most vile and pernicious creatures my eyes have ever beheld. There's nothin more deadly
than a Mama defending her younguns, and this is the Mother of all Mama's. Y'all just do whatever ya
can to survive this un-Godly creation.

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